We are coming into a time of the year that many, many folks literally hate – Thanksgiving and Christmas. It is not that they hate the commercialism of this holidays and the fact that decorations and sales have been going on since early September. It is not that they hate the materialism of these holidays with the emphasis on gift giving and gift getting and trying to outdo one another both on the creativity of our gifts and the price of our gifts, not to mention who got the “best” (usually meaning the most expensive) gift. And it is not that they hate the crowds, the long lines and short tempers. No. Their hatred of this time of year comes from the fact that these holidays are very family oriented.
Much of the advertising of various products is done against the backdrop of a family gathering either around the holiday meal or the Christmas tree or waiting at the airport or the front door for that last relative to make their appearance. Remember the Folger’s Coffee commercials of a few years ago that had the long awaited son come home in the wee hours of the morning and put on a pot of coffee? As the aroma awakens the siblings and mom the first thoughts that pop into their minds is that “John is home!” Now the holiday is complete.
I can relate to that commercial for I have a family that is large enough to fill a good size table and pass a good many presents around the tree. We have our traditions and rituals that make the holidays special and meaningful for us. We have memories and stories that we share and which are punctuated by special recipes and ornaments and decorations. I am blessed with a family that is close enough physically and emotionally to gather, usually at our home, to give thanks, enjoy a good meal and the love and care of one another. It is a special, even holy, time of year.
But if you have little or no family to give you the “warm fuzzys” and nostalgic good feelings that are depicted over and over as the heart and soul of the holidays; if you do not have a family close enough, healthy enough both physically and emotionally to gather together; if hard feelings rather than warm ones; if there is hatred rather than love; apathy rather than care and concern; if your family doesn’t look like the touchy-feely, huggy -huggy kind that you see on the ads then this is not a time of the year that you enjoy. And over the years that discomfort can easily turn to longing which can easily turn to jealousy which can easily turn to resentment, and then bitterness and then – hatred. This can be, and is, a very difficult time of year for many folks.
I wish I knew some “magic words" to make all that discomfort, longing, jealousy, resentment, bitterness and hatred go away for those people. I do not. But I do know that if I was not blessed with my family I would still have a family in my church. And while I might still spend Thanksgiving and/or Christmas by myself or at one of the community dinners, I would not be alone in the celebration of the holidays. I would be included in my church family’s traditions and rituals that would make this a special, even holy, time of year for me.
So I offer you an invitation from the family of God known as Otterbein to come and share with us at any or all of our family gatherings during this holiday season. And if you do, it is my prayer that the Spirit will use us to ease you discomfort, fulfill some of your longing, overcome come of your jealousy, turn away your resentment, take away some of your bitterness and overcome your hatred with the love of Christ.
See you at the family gatherings.
Pastor Steve
