The Traveler

June 2008

                   

            A publication of The First United Methodist Church,  18 Wesley Way (Rt. 11A), PO Box 7408, Gilford, NH 03247-7408

 

Pastor's Epistle

 

                 In this time of “recession” (is there one or not?) we are seeing sky-rocketing costs for gas, heat, petroleum products, grain products, meat, milk, and any food that needs to be transported from another place.  These costs are impacting all of us at home and in the church.

                 And it is at these times that the church, as a center of the community, becomes even more important.  Let’s look at some of the ways:

¨      Entertainment: Come to the movie nights for a free night out or come to the church picnic, covered dish dinners, concerts and plays.   Even at $ 7 per person to come to a concert or play, that is much less expensive than driving to Boston or Concord, and even less expensive than other entertainment options in the area.

¨      Gas usage: We have combined some meetings or piggybacked them so people can make fewer trips. This is especially important for those who travel the farthest. Come to worship and join friends for lunch.

¨      Fellowship:  Feel trapped in your house?  Come to the crafts group on Tuesdays, stay to play games and eat lunch.  Come to worship and meet with friends.  We have a library and movies to watch on the VCR.  Bring a movie from the local library and share it with others.  Use the church as a central meeting place – just let us know when you are coming.

¨      Provide help to others:  Bring extra produce on Sundays for a produce table in the narthex and share your extra crops with others.  Take home what you need.  Bring food for the food pantry.  Work at the rummage sale – buy at the rummage sale!  It’s a great way to pass on or get quality clothes and small products. Bring recent magazines for the magazine rack and feel free to take home magazines.  By sharing we all gain.

¨      Think about Christmas and birthday gifts:  The products at the auction and the Holiday Fair are good and usually less expensive than stores.  Instead of buying at the mall, think of what you can buy at the fairs to give to others.  Then everyone gains – the missions of the church, your budget, and those who receive the gifts.

¨      Worship:  when times are hard, we know that we need this time to reconnect with God.  This summer, you have the choice of two times, so you can come at the time that works best for you.  Strengthen your faith, for that relationship with Christ is the most important thing you will have during hard times.

 

                 In the past, the church was the center of the Christian Community and was a light to all the surrounding community.  Let’s keep that light bright.

           

            In Christ,

                        Rev. Vickie Wood Parrish

 

Contact Information

 

Church office

(603) 524-3289

 

E-Mail

umclr@worldpath.net

 

Staff

 


Pastor

Rev. Dr. Victoria Wood Parrish

 

 

Secretary

Joyce Keyser

 

 

Choir Director

Karen Jordan

 

 

Organist

Betty Welch

 

 

Asst. Organist

Kelly Cleveland

 

 

Treasurer

Shelli Boucher

 

 

Sextons

Stan Piper & Peter Ayer

 

 

Nursery

Jeanne Hibbard-Bickford


 

Publication Deadlines

 

July & August newsletter information:  June 11

 

Chairpersons reports for the next Administrative Council meeting: 

June 8

 

Bulletin Announcements:

Wednesday prior to the Sunday you want the announcement in.

 

June Worship

 

June 1—Communion Sunday

            Sermon—"Finding the Lost Lamb"  Matthew 11:16-19, 25-30

June 8—

            Sermon—"Accepting Those Promises"  Genesis 12:1-8

 

June 15—Father's Day and Tool Sunday

            Children's day in church  - come and see them on screen and in Worship! 

June 22—To be announced.

June 28—Saturday

          Natural Church Development retreat.

June 29

            Sermon—"Making a Stand"  Joshua 24:14-15

            All church Picnic after worship.

 

During worship there is Children's Faith Quest.  Sunday school will continue through the summer.

 

Broadcast of Worship on TV

 

LRPA-TV, Sundays at 5:00 AM and 6:00 PM

 

            The worship services and concerts are being recorded for broadcast on LRPA-TV.  

            If you do not wish to be filmed, please stop by the media desk so they can direct you to a secure seat.

            Sunday's broadcasts are for the previous weeks worship service. 

 

Upcoming Events

 

The Friday Film Fest

June 6, 2008 at 6:00 PM

 

            Join for fellowship and a movie on June 6th from 6:00 PM.  The movie is "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?" with George Clooney.  It has some foot-tapping gospel music to boot!

            We begin with our famous pot luck supper at 6:00 PM.  Instead of suggesting menu courses, let's go on faith and see what goodies we come up with. 

            We look forward to greeting our snowbirds who were fortunate enough to miss this past winter; however, they also missed some good movies and good discussions.  Finally, we'll have our whole film family back together.  New folks are more than welcome to join us.

            Anyone needing childcare should notify Marge Grisevich at 293 4624.

 

Sisters in Spirit” Tea Party

Saturday, June 21st, 1:00—3:00 PM

 

   

          "Sisters in Spirit” invite all women and friends for a fun filled “Tea Party” at the house of Georgia Sauter, 47 Lower Waldron Rd. in Meredith, NH.  Phone # 279-5121

            Come in your glamorous, ready for laughter, outrageous colors!  Pick up a cup and treat, step outside and take the first available seat.  Enjoy and share with the ladies near you.

            Please agree to share a story, poem, joke, book of interest, skit, song or ….???

This should be 1-3 minutes long.

 

All Church Picnic

Sunday, June 29th at 11:30 AM

 

            Keep your ears open for news about a picnic after church on the 29th of June.  We hope to make this a fun time of fellowship for everyone.

 

Auction

August 2, 2008

 

          Are you ready to help with the action at the auction? Sign up sheets are in the Fellowship Hall and donations will be accepted after June 1.  Please leave good furniture, antiques, crafts, collectables, etc,. in the Fellowship Hall for sorting.

            Please – we want this to be a quality auction for the community, so please do not donate items that are broken, don’t work or need to be sent to the dumpster.

 

Wesley Woods Wellness Clinic

 

Need your blood pressure monitored?

Do you have difficulty trimming your own toenails?

 

            Through the Community Health and Hospice,  Wesley Woods is not offering blood pressure screening and basic toenail trimming on the 1st Thursday of every month in their rooms at the church. 

            A donation of $15 is requested for clinic services.  Please plan to bring a basin and a towel if you would like your feet soaked prior to having your toe nails trimmed.

            Call Staci Dicker-Hendricks at Wesley Woods (528-2555) for an appointment or sign up in the Community Room.

            For more information about this or other Community Health and Hospice clinics or services, call 524-8444 or visit their website at www.chhnh.org.

 

Wanakee Bar-B-Q

 

            Mark your calendar to visit Wanakee on July 19, 2008 for their annual Homecoming celebration.  There is a Footnotes concert and BBQ.  The concert begins at 10 AM. 

            The Barbeque runs from 11 AM—2 PM.  Cost is $8 for adults and $5 for children 12 and under.  It's lots of fun.  Make it a family day to see Wanakee for the first time, or to revisit your old  haunts at our own Methodist camp.

            Wanakee is located at 75 Upper New Hampton Rd. in Meredith.  

 

Special Events in June

 

June 12-15 – Annual Conference at Gordon College

June 14-22 – Bike Week.  The Weirs Church ministry needs baked goods.

June 15 – Children’s Day in Church – came and see them on screen and in worship!

June 28 – Natural Church Development Retreat

June 29 – All Church Picnic

 

Looking Toward July

 

July 1 – 10:30 – Memorial Service for Shelton Symington, former member

July 6 – Summer worship hours begin.  There will be two services – 8:30 and 10:30.

July 7- 18 -  Rocking Rainbow Bible Camp

July 13 – Arizona Children’s Choir sings in Church.  They will also have a concert at the

            church on Sunday at 3 PM – watch for more information!

July 18 – Performance of “100% Chance of Rain” for the congregation by Rocking Rainbow

            Camp.

July 20 – Heifitz String Concert in the sanctuary.

 

 

"Laughter should be held almost as holy as prayers.  God, I am certain, has a sense of humor.  He would have to have.  To make people smile—surely this must be one of the most sacred acts a human being can perform."

James Dillett Freeman, Poet Laurette, Unity Church, via the Joyful Noiseletter

 

Church Family News

 

 

In Sympathy

 

            Our sympathy to family and friends of Ray Smith, 53, who died at home on May 9th.   Ray joined our church several years with his wife, Kathy.  Ray made a strong impact on all who came to know him and he will be greatly missed. 

 

            Our sympathy to family and friends of Duke Evans who died on May 15th in Flemington, NJ.  A member of our church since 1994, Duke loved volunteering in newsletter assembly, working on the Harvest Dinner and in other areas.  He will be remembered by many.

 

Graduations

 

            Please let us know of any graduations—high school or college—in our church family.  There will be a time of recognition planned for our graduates and we'd like to include all the graduates.

 

            Taryn Stewart is graduating from Plymouth State University; cum laude with a major in Business Administration and a minor in Economics.  Congratulations, Taryn!

 

Happy June Birthday

2        Elaine Halvorson

3        Colby and Tyler Jordan

4        Cassidy Keyser

          Joshua Weinmann

5        Leslie Smith

6        Christopher Campbell

          Nicole Bogert

          Randy Corbitt

7        Scott Alward

8        Jennifer Pollini

          Ryan Witham

9        Scott Halvorson

12      Arlene Newell

13      Paul Weston

14      Christina Gribben

15      Heather Hickey

          Alexis Burgess

18      Marian Hutchins

          Diane Malcolm

          Patsy Tacker

19      Tracy Cooper-Brovitz

21      Victoria Wood Parrish

25      Fred Kacprzynski

          Rita Polhemus

27      Kayne Kreitzer

 

June Anniversaries

 

1        Chris & Annie Weinmann

2        Rob & Vickie Stewart

5        Vi & Joe Adrignola

10      Jerry & Mary Albert

12      Don & Sue Nelson

          Jim & Lorrie Baird

          Cynthia & Dick Swan

21      Maurice & Ginny Simond

23      Cecil & Trudy Jordan

          Jeff & Marie Simmons

24      Howard & Carrie Chandler

26      Jack & Shirley Woodward

 

 

Letter to Church, Family and Friends

 

            I just want to thank everyone who touched our lives especially in the last three years.  We made some wonderful friends and were embraced by a wonderful, loving church.  Without your support these years would have been much harder. 

            Ray was at peace knowing that I had so many loving and supporting people around me, both family and friends.

            I truly believe the Lord brought us to this church. From day one we felt your support and love.  So many people told Ray that he was an inspiration, and that really meant a lot to him and me.

            I don't know what is in store for the future; only  God knows that, but I do know that Ray's life touched many people and that will live on forever.

            Thank you all and God bless you,

            Love,

            Kathy Smith

 

Summer Worship Hours

 

            The summer, we will be worshiping two times on Sunday, starting the first

Sunday in July and continuing through August. 

            The early service will be at 8:30 AM and will be a casual, come as you are service.  You can choose your favorite songs and choruses from the two hymnals, and if you want to bring something new to learn, we can!

            The later service will be a more traditional service at 10:30, with special music every week.  This service will have special activities – music by the Arizona Children’s Choir on July 13, Blessing of the Animals on August 3, and the Polhemus family choir (is it really 80 people strong?) on August 31.

           

            Children will have Sunday church school all summer, so bring them, too.

Come and Worship

 

Volunteer News

 

Vacation Bible School Help needed

 

          We will need helpers, a snack coordinator and snack makers, others to be announced later.  The "100% Chance of Rain" Bible camp will take place July 7-18 each weekday from 9:00 AM – 1:00 PM. 

 

Thanks

 

            Thank you to all our hard working snow clearing volunteers.  This was a brutal winter and we have these folks to thank:  George Hetherington, Jack Woodward, Chuck French, Carl and Lorraine Gebhardt, Jeff Keyser, Phil Polhemus, Charlie Kellogg, Tom Hickey, John Gill, and Aaron Witham.  Also thank you to anyone who didn't sign up but helped anyways.  Your help in this area keeps us going in the winter and we appreciate it.

 

Lawn Mowing Help Needed

 

            Without our grounds being dug up this year, we once again will have a fuller, more lovely lawn.  That lawn requires some folks who would be willing to use our ride on lawn mower to cut the grass. 

            We have a sign-up sheet on the bulletin board in the Fellowship Hall.  Please  sign up as an individual or a team and help our lawn look lovely again this year.  Thank you for your service.

 

New Shower in the Education Wing

 

            In an effort to be responsible to the community, we have worked for years with the Red Cross to be an emergency Housing site.  We were contacted immediately after Katrina to house people, but because we had no shower facilities, we could not be used.

            Feeling that this is an important ministry of the church, steps were taken to add a shower in the education wing.  This was finished last month, thanks to the hard work of David Witham and George Hetherington.  Now we can house people in case of an ice storm or other local emergency, or provide teens with showers after an overnight, help the High School with housing during drama and music festivals – and welcome people from around the country who need Red Cross housing temporarily. 

Come and see the new shower!

 

Christian Education

 

Revelation Bible Study

 

            This summer we will be offering a Bible study on the book of Revelation.  This is a part of the Bible that scares many people and intrigues almost everyone.  What are those strange symbols?  What do they mean?  Should we be worried?  This Bible study is open to everyone who is interested.

            Because of the other summer activities, we are not able to have this study at the usual evening times.   Therefore, we will meet on Mondays from 1:00 – 2:00 PM in the Taylor Home library, starting on June 9th, and on Tuesdays at 5:30 – 6:30 PM in our church Library, starting on June 10th.  This will be an eight week class.   Everyone will need to bring a Bible. 

This is set up so that if you know that you will miss a class on one day, you can go to the other class.

            If you have questions, call Rev. Wood Parrish at 524-3289.

 

 

100% Chance of Rain! 2008 Vacation Bible School

 

and will be open for all young people who have completed 1st  grade through those who have completed 7th grade.  It is sponsored by the Wesley Arts Committee.

 

July 7-18

9:00 AM – 1:00 PM

Two weeks for $40

 

          This will be a music and drama based camp.  On the night of July 18, we will be presenting the musical “100% Chance of Rain” in the sanctuary.  This is the story of Noah and the Ark.   Due to the nature of the camp, campers need to participate for both weeks.   There will be a limit of 40 campers, so sign up early!  Other churches will be invited after May 1.

If you are interested in having your child (ren) come, please complete a registration form.  They are available in the church office, or by calling the church office (524-3289) to have one mailed to you.  Return it as quickly as possible to insure that your child will be able to take part in this two week Bible camp. 

 

 

Bring Your Children To The New Children’s Choir!

 

Come and find out what is happening!

On Monday evenings from 6:00 to 7:00 PM

 in the Fireside Room

For any one who is in 1st grade through 8th grade. 

We will sort into age levels as we see who is here.

 

Leaders: Phil Polhemus and Vickie Wood Parrish

 

Parents – children who are involved in music learn many things: to express themselves, to have confidence, and to read another language (music).  There seems to be evidence that children who are involved in music have a better ability to understand math in later years.  It also is a good way to use up that excess energy!

 

Lectionary

 

The Lectionary is a list of Bible readings used in many Christian churches.  It is set up in a format that after three years it has covered most of the Bible.  Often the pastor refers to the lectionary for the readings to be used during worship for that week. 

 

June 1—3rd Sunday after Pentecost

            Genesis 6:11-22, 7:24, 8:14-19; Psalm 46; Romans 1:16-17, 3:22a-28 (29-31);

            Matthew 7:21-29

 

June 8—4th Sunday after Pentecost

            Genesis 12:1-9; Psalm 33:1-12; Romans 4:13-25; Matthew 9:9-13, 18-26

 

June 15—5th Sunday after Pentecost

            Genesis 18:1-15; Psalm 116:1-2, 12-19; Romans 5:1-8; Matthew 9:35-10:8 (9-23)

 

June 22—6th Sunday after Pentecost

            Genesis 21:8-21; Psalm 86:1-10, 16-17 or Psalm 17; Romans 6:1b-11;

            Matthew 10:24-39

 

June 29—7th Sunday after Pentecost

            Genesis 22:1-14; Psalm 13; Romans 6:12-23; Matthew 10:40-42

 

Evangelism

 

Missing Worship?

 

            Most of us have Sundays in which we are unable to make it to church.  For those who attend regularly, it leaves a hole in our lives—a holy hole!  For the next week our first thought each morning is "Is today Sunday?"  Some kind of internal clock keeps the rhythms of our lives in check.

            While there's no real substitute for being in worship with others, we do provide for those who can't be with us in a couple of ways:

            A friend can pick up a VHS of the service right after the service and take it to you unedited, or you can call the church office and ask to have it delivered.  In this way, you can get a little visit, too.

            Our edited worship services are broadcast on a one-week delayed basis every Sunday on LRPA-TV (Channel 25 in Gilford) at 5:00 AM and again at 6:30 PM on Sundays.  This channel is rather flexible about its programming times so it can accommodate differences in program lengths.

            Pass the word along to any shut-ins you know.  In this way we can help keep the flame of Methodism burning in the  hearts of our church family.

            Nancy Thomason, chair.

            Evangelism Committee

 

Natural Church Development

 

Natural Church Development Retreat – June 28

We have been working on the Natural Church development project for a year and are ready for a church-wide kick off!  Every leader in the church is invited to a Saturday retreat at the church on June 28 from 9 to 4.

Find out our growing edges. 

Start making plans with you committee on how we can implement the project.

Work together to make a “good” church “great”.

 

Who should come?

          Every person in the church who wants to grow spiritually.

          Every committee member.

          Every committee leader.

          Every member of Administrative council.

          Everyone!

 

Let the church office know if you would need child care in order to attend so we can make arrangements.

 

Missions

 

Tool Sunday

June 15, 2008

 

            Church World Service’s Tool Sunday is an opportunity for  you to help place tools  in the hands of people in need.   The variety of tools offered can make a world of difference for people devastated by tragedy, as well as those working to build a better life for themselves and their communities.

            This Tool Sunday, on Father’s Day, give a donation  for tools in honor or memory of a loved one.  Your gift can help Church World Service work in partnership in some 80 countries.

            Please call the church office with your dedication for the gift by June 11th  for inclusion in the bulletin on Father's Day.

 

2008 New Orleans Katrina Mission Trip

 

The Milford United Methodist Church has again invited folks from Laconia/Gilford UMC to accompany them to New Orleans for a mission.

The date is the week of October 27-October, 2008.  There are 35 spaces reserved at a two building bunkhouse at the Presbyterian Church in Slidell.  We will again work out of the Methodist facility in Slidell. 

This year the work will be done in New Orleans, maybe in the Lower 9th Ward where we visited last year.  The indication is that this year the work will be new construction or additions. 

The cost is again $300 for room and board.  You provide your own round trip transportation.  Most people will fly down on Sunday the 27th and return on Saturday the 1st of November.  A $50 deposit is due by June 1st.  Please call David Witham (286-9590) for more information.

 

Common Pantry

 

            Between January—April of this year the FUMC of Gilford/Laconia has donated an approximate total of $2,500 in goods and  money to the Common Pantry.

            Things needed in the future continue to be the same-

                                   


  paper and personal goods

              canned meats

              fish

  fruit

  cereal

  diapers


            When you are determining what you might bring on any Sunday, just think of what you  and your family may need during the week or month, and then try to donate accordingly.

            Thank you,  

            Bev Jones—Common Pantry Coordinator.

 

Finance Report

 

Finance Report for April

           

As of April 30, we were  33.3% of the way through the budget year.  We had received 29.7% of our anticipated income for the year.  The previous five year average is 31.6%.

We have expended 36% of our anticipated expenses for the year, which is $12, 926 more than we received year to date. 

 

Ways you can help financially….

 

1.   The finance committee is looking ahead to the next snow season.  Last year, due to heavy snows, the cost of snow plowing skyrocketed – and the next winter will come!  Can you make a designated second mile gift to help the budget recover from last winter, or to look ahead to next winter?  We are also concerned about the cost of heating fuel for our next contact year.

2.   The missions committee has extended a challenge that we tithe our economic stimulus checks  to the work of African missions.  They have chosen to missions to support.  First, money will be sent to the Kavale family in Africa to pay for food for the children they support in Kenya.   Second, money will be sent to support the trip Heather Parrish is taking with the Drew University students to the Watoto Children’s compound in Uganda to work with AIDS orphans. They will be building housing and teaching Bible School.

 

Please consider these opportunities prayerfully.

 

Here I Am Lord—Missionaries of the United Methodist Church

 

"And God's mercy is on those who fear God from generation to generation."

Luke 1:50  (An Inclusive-Language Lectionary)

 

            When I was a toddler, my father was killed in crossfire between the Israeli and Jordanian armies.  One good thing to come from the tragedy was my mother's revived commitment to the Christ she experienced as a student in a Christian school.  As a result, I was practically raised in the church.

            As a child, I was proud to be a Christian, and I became consumed with the desire to see my fellow Palestinians share the faith and hope that brought so much comfort to my family.

            I prayed that God would send more missionaries to my country.  God spoke to my heart and asked, "Why don't you go?  Why don't you help your people?"  I realized God wanted me to be in mission.  I decided to give God a chance.

            So I went to Bible college and to Asbury Theological Seminary in the United States.  I studied mission and evangelism.  I was commissioned by the General Board of Global Ministries to be a missionary with my people—the Palestinian people of the Holy Land.  I'm happy to be where I feel God wants me to be.

            Through the Advance for Christ and His Church, many people give.  We are very grateful because their generosity enables us to share the good news.  Thank you!

           

God, your Son called Peter and Andrew to leave their nets and follow him.  Encourage us also to "fish for people."  In  your name we pray.  Amen.

 

Bethlehem Bible College, Vision 20-20, Bethlehem, #12017A and #13557N

Awad, Alex,  #10825Z

Awad, Brenda,  #10826Z

 

The Rev. Alex Awad, pastor and teacher; and Brenda Awad, administrator and teacher

Bethlehem Bible College, Palestine

 

Prayer Chain

 

            Did you know that your church has a prayer line? 

            If you or a loved one needs prayer, please do not hesitate to call in your prayer request to Vickie (528-2495) or Joyce (527-1873).  You may also call the church directly at 524-3289. 

            We will spread the concern through the prayer chain as quickly as possible, so praying may begin for your concern. 

If you would like to join the prayer chain, give Joyce a call and let

her know.  More pray-ers are always welcomed.

 

Serving in June

 

If those signed up change weeks of  service, please contact the church office (524-3289) so that the correct  information can be placed in the bulletin each week.  Thank you.

 

Liturgists

 

June     1          Maurice Simond

            8          Scott Alward

            15        Karl Kimball

            22        David Witham

            29        Paul Weston

 

Ushers

 

June     1          Jack & Shirley Woodward

            8          Peter & Anne Eckel

            15        Ron & Carol Dodier  

            22        Bev Jones & Gail Tapply

            29        Richard Kincaid & Charlie Kellogg

 

Greeters

 

June     1          Doris Blanchard & Jerri Dean

            8          Marian Hutchins & Jerri Dean

            15        Betty Ann Moore & Dick Kincaid

            22        Jane Shepard & Jerri Dean

            29        Jerri Dean & Stephen Read

 

Nursery Assistant

 

June     1          Marie Simmons

            8          Stephen Read

            15        Becky Gilbert

            22        Nancy Thomason

            29        Barbara French

 

Counters

 

June     1          Debby Pare & Ellen Cosgrove

            8          Joel Young & Dick Walden

            15        Don Nelson & Roger Shelton

            22        Allyn Smith & Gail Tapply

            29        Maurice Simond & David Witham

 

Flowers

 

June     1          Dick & Marilyn Miller

            8          Joy & Charlie Noble

            15        Marian Hutchins & family

            22        Maurice & Ginny Simond

            29        Tom & Lela Corbin

 

Coffee/Fellowship Time

 

June     1          Ruth Gill

            8          Gerri Westwood

            15        Ellen Cosgrove

            22        Nancy Morley

            29        Josie Nichols

 

 

August Newsletter

 

            We want to be economically and socially responsible (and save money!), so there will be no newsletter for the month of August.

            The  September newsletter will come a little early so we can be prepared for the fall activities.  Therefore, if you want anything in the September newsletter, please have it in by August 11th – and August news needs to be in the July newsletter

 

Deadline for July/August Newsletter is June 11th.

 

 

Calendar of Events

 

June 2008

 

Weekly

 

Sunday

  9:00 AM  Choir rehearsal

  9:30 AM  Adult Sunday school

10:30 AM  Worship

10:30 AM  Children's Sunday school

12:45 PM  African Worship (until 2:15)

 

Monday

   1:00 PM  Revelation Bible Study at the Taylor Home's Library  (begins June 9)

   6:00 PM  Children's choir

   7:00 PM  Handbell rehearsals

 

Tuesday

  9:30 AM  Arts and Crafts in the Fireside Room

  5:30 PM  Daisy Scouts

  5:30 PM  Revelation Bible Study in the Library (begins June 10)

 

Wednesday

  6:30 PM  Girl Scouts in the Fellowship Hall

 

Jokes Pastors Can Tell

 

            A U.S. Congressman died and went to heaven.  "Welcome," said St. Peter.  "We seldom see Congressmen."

            St. Peter explained, "Here's how it works.  You'll spend one day in hell and one day in heaven, then choose where you want to spend eternity."

            When the Congressman went to hell, he saw a golf course, a clubhouse, and politician friends.  They dined and reminisced.  Their host, the devil, seemed very pleasant.

            The next day the Congressman returned to heaven, where he saw many contented souls playing musical instruments and singing.

            "Time to choose eternity," St. Peter said.  The Congressman reflected and choose hell.

            Back in hell, the Congressman saw a barren land full of garbage, fire and smoke, and his friends in rags.  A smiling devil greeted him.

            "But," the Congressman protested, "yesterday there was golf, lobster, champagne, and great times."

            The devil replied, "Yesterday we were campaigning… Today you voted.

                                    via George Goldtrap, Ormond-by-the-Sea, FL and the Joyful Noiseletter

 

"If Columbus had an advisory committee, he would probably still be at the dock."

Arthur Goldberg, via the Joyful Noiseletter

 

 

Calendar of Events

 

6          6:00 PM—First Friday Potluck Dinner and Film Fest.

8          Administrative Council reports due in the office.

            1200 PM—Wesley Arts meeting in the Library

9          7:00 AM—Men's Breakfast at the Soda Shoppe in Laconia

10        Friendly Kitchen

11        Newsletter Deadline for July and August

            Deadline for Tool Sunday dedications

            7:00 PM—Finance Committee meeting in the Library

            7:15 PM—Trustees Committee meeting in the Fireside Room

12        7:15 PM  Carter Mountain Band rehearsal in the Fireside Room

13 - 15 Annual Conference at Gordon College, Wenham, MA

15        Father's Day, Tool Sunday, Children's Day

18        7:00 PM—Administrative Council meeting in the Fireside Room

21        1:00 PM—Sisters in Spirit Tea at the home of Georgia Sauter.

23        7:00 AM—Men's Breakfast at the Soda Shoppe in Laconia

25        9:00 AM—Newsletter ready to be assembled.  If you are able to help, let Joyce know (524-3289)

            10:00 AM—Open Door Fellowship in the Library

26        7:15 PM  Carter Mountain Band rehearsal in the Fireside Room

28        9:00 AM—4:00 PM—Natural Church Development retreat

29        All Church Picnic after church

 

 

            A  Texas farmer visiting Australia was curious about what farming was like there, so he visited a farm.  The Aussie farmer took the Texan on a tour of his farm.  He pointed and said, "that's my wheat crop."

            "Mine's bigger," the Texan replied.

            "Those are my cattle," the Aussie said.

            "I've got four times as many," the Texan said.  At that moment a kangaroo hopped by.

            "What the heck is that?" asked the Texan.

            "Don't you have grasshoppers in Texas?" the Aussie replied.

Noel and Martha Edwards, Twentynine Palms, CA

Via the Joyful Noiseletter